Your Partner May Be Toxic If They Say These 8 Things (2023)

FAQs

What makes a partner toxic? ›

Your relationship may be toxic if it is characterized by behaviors that make you feel unhappy, including disrespect, dishonesty, controlling behaviors, or a lack of support.

If a relationship stops bringing joy, and instead consistently makes you feel sad, angry, anxious or “resigned, like you've sold out,” it may be toxic, Glass says. You may also find yourself envious of happy couples. Fuller says negative shifts in your mental health, personality or self-esteem are all red flags, too.

Over time, this can turn a relationship toxic. Subtle character assassination, control without knowing it, jealous passive-aggressive behavior, never taking ownership, and negativity for too long, are all common behaviors we have been guilty of in our relationships.

Red flags in a relationship include excessive jealousy and frequent lying. You should also be wary of a partner who frequently criticizes you or puts you down. Another major red flag is an unwillingness to compromise — relationships shouldn't be one-sided.

Relationships that involve physical or verbal abuse are definitely classified as toxic. But there are other, more subtle, signs of a toxic relationship, including: You give more than you're getting, which makes you feel devalued and depleted. You feel consistently disrespected or that your needs aren't being met.

Toxic relationships generally follow three stages: idealizing, devaluing, and discarding. Learn about each of these stages and the impact it has on you.

Real love cannot happen in a toxic relationship.

Two people have to merge their lives and validate each other's decisions. As I'm sure you know, getting two people to agree on something can be incredibly difficult. When you're in a toxic relationship, realizing or accepting its toxicity isn't easy.

People with toxic traits know they have them

It's natural to assume someone's bad behavior is a conscious choice. But many people with toxic traits don't realize that their behavior impacts others. You may have toxic traits that you don't know about. Some toxic traits, like absolutism, manifest subtly.

Can a toxic relationship be fixed? ›

Yes, toxic relationships can change. But that comes with a very big if. A toxic relationship can change if and only if both partners are equally committed to overcoming it with lots of open communication, honesty, self-reflection, and possibly professional help, individually and together.

What is gaslighting in a relationship? It's a form of psychological manipulation in which one person makes the other partner doubt his or her perceptions, experiences, memories, or understanding of events that happened.

Toxic love often means oscillating between strong highs (excitement and passion) and intense lows (anxiety and depression). You revel in the highs but mostly experience the lows.

What's manipulation in relationships? Psychological manipulation often refers to words, omissions, and actions that attempt to control how another person feels, thinks, and behaves. This may affect their perspective of themselves, the relationship, and the world in general.

Physical, emotional, or mental abuse

Physical, emotional, and mental abuse are undeniable red flags in any relationship. Physical abuse is easier to pick up. But emotional and mental abuse can be just as damaging in the long run. And just like physical abuse, mental and emotional abuse can cause PTSD.

Having an unhealthy lifestyle, such as smoking, drinking too much, or not getting enough sleep can be a red flag in men. This is because it indicates that he isn't taking good care of himself, which is a sign that he may not be able to take care of you either.

What are 3 signs of a toxic relationship? ›

Toxic text messages are texts that drain you physically and mentally while affecting the overall health of your relationship. These texts demand you to act or behave in a certain way that is unnatural and only satisfies your partner's insecurities.

What does it mean to stonewall someone? In simple terms, stonewalling is when someone completely shuts down in a conversation or is refusing to communicate with another person.

In true love, there is comfort in separate interests. We can have our own friends and meaningful relationships outside of our romantic relationships. We can pursue interests and ideas without fear of reprimand. On the other hand, in toxic love, there is total involvement in one another's lives.

If you've addressed toxic behavior with the person exhibiting it and they have taken it to heart, it's possible for toxic people to change. “Toxic people can absolutely change,” Kennedy says, “however they must see their part in the problem before they are likely to find the motivation to do so.”

A toxic relationship occurs when one or both people are prioritizing love over the three core components of a healthy relationship: respect, trust, and affection.

Controlling. One of the most dangerous traits of a toxic person is controlling behavior. They may try to restrict you from contacting your friends or family, or limit resources like transportation or access to money to restrict your ability to interact with the world around you.

Rest assured: Toxic people can be healed with conscious effort and self-awareness. But you need to be willing to change and accept responsibility to move forward and let go of the toxic traits in yourself. You can learn how to undo your past and how to stop being toxic in a relationship.

Can you break a toxic relationship? ›

"If someone finds themselves in a toxic relationship, they should get the help required to change it or get out of it," Campbell says. It's important, she notes, to start creating a game plan. Depending on the level of seriousness, this can mean confiding in friends and family for advice or seeking a therapist.

When it comes to surrounding ourselves with toxic people, or even listening to what they have to say, it's best to take the highroad and completely ignore them.

These behaviors may manifest from underlying feelings of low self-esteem and mental health conditions such as narcissistic personality disorder (NPD), childhood trauma, or other deeply rooted personal issues.

Toxic femininity includes any thoughts, actions, or behaviors by women that benefit or defer others, usually males, at the expense of a woman's independence, agency, full range of emotions, and emotional and mental well-being.

There are seven toxic habits that you should quit today. Stop comparing yourself to others, letting your past impact your present and future, not taking your own advice, expecting the worst, not taking chances, not sharpening your saw, and being too hard on yourself.

The toxic traits of a toxic person include unsupportive and unpleasant behavior, being manipulative, judgmental, controlling, and self-centered. Such people can be the cause of various negative feelings and emotions that you may be experiencing like depression, anxiousness, worthlessness, and unhappiness.

People with toxic traits know they have them

It's natural to assume someone's bad behavior is a conscious choice. But many people with toxic traits don't realize that their behavior impacts others. You may have toxic traits that you don't know about. Some toxic traits, like absolutism, manifest subtly.

These include dominance, control, insensitivity and aggression. Toxic men display destructive behaviors. They think they must be the dominant part and not show any feelings. Only then are they true men in their eyes.

What is toxic love examples? ›

For example, they bring out the gossipy side of you, or they seem to draw out a mean streak you don't normally have. You feel like you have to walk on eggshells around this person to keep from becoming a target of their venom. You spend a lot of time and emotional strength trying to cheer them up.